Thursday, August 30, 2012

I'd be interested to know how other people write blogs

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I feel like I have a lot of things that I could write about, since I always seem to have a pretty incoherent stream of thoughts throughout the day. Just in the past 5 minutes I thought about writing how I'm a hipster and hate current writing trends, how I hate when I see people write about mundane things like fitness goals, then I wanted to write about how I'm just a hater in general, then I wanted to write about how maybe I should hate less. Hate's a strong word, which I would have discussed had I written a post about it. Maybe I would have explained how it's not that I hate the people or even the post but rather the choice of subject matter. A lot of people sell themselves pretty short when they write about their trivial pursuits. Maybe these feelings are inspired because I imagined what my own fitness blog would look like.

Week 1 - Lost 2 pounds, ran more than I wanted to and wanted to cry while squatting. Didn't get any stronger. I suck.

Week 2 - Fell off the wagon and gained 2 pounds. Ran a bunch. Fuck squatting that shit hurts I'm just gonna have nice abs and arms.

I guess it's how I feel when people post up covers of certain songs. Life's too short to try to copy someone else's greatness.

I saw an error bar under else's. I hope I did that right. I feel pretty stupid not knowing basic grammatical things. I like how it's okay to point out someone's spelling or grammatical error, or even criticize their command of the language, but not to criticize the fact that someone still believes in sky fairies or that some supernatural dimension exists for people who are on santa's good and bad lists.

I also thought about writing vegas trip reports similar to the poker blogs I've read. This thought was more of a thought blink in my mind. While I enjoy reading people's escapades I'd feel so silly writing one of my own. It's the equivalent of trash tv to me. Might be fun watching jersey shore but I don't think anyone actually wants to star in it.

Dear god I need to learn how to write transitions. I think I know like two transitory sentences. "Another thing I found interesting." Hah. So as you can guess I am now transitioning to the next topic that I thought about briefly when wondering what to write, which is writing the type of opinion/humor/fiction that I tend to fall back on when I do write. Maybe it's my way of peeking out of my shell in a non threatening way. Hard to make fun of a man who makes fun of himself! Can't sling shit on me when I'm bathing in it!

I think the big thing that keeps me from wanting to write about some topics is that I don't want too many specifics about me in any type of public setting. The world and my career have made me paranoid as shit. All sorts of weird shitty people doing nothing all day but sitting ass naked with their dick in their hand wanking at the internet in general. I see you, creepy guy. All those things you heard about people being able to spy through your built in web cam are true. Hi!!

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

on hold

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 There was a time when I thought my next job would be right around the corner, and that the hours I wasted only felt long - that in actuality it was juvenile anxiety, eager for christmas morning to come, that seemed to stretch my days. Bursting with excitement I'd draft cover letters, gushing at job descriptions that promised challenging occupations in exciting places. I could not be any luckier than to have the opportunity I had to apply to these positions. Days would fly by, because my mind wasn't focused on my work, but was instead fantasizing about the crazy shit I'd design that would change the course of humanity forever. I was so close to accelerating human understanding of life, the universe...you know. Like a bachelor with late night company on the stroll home I was almost there. I'd already done the hard grunt work. All that remained was some delicate maneuvering.

At some point I decided to be prudent and expand my horizons. As years of adventurous experiences have taught me, sometimes the way in isn't through the front. Prudence dictates testing all orifices. While still gushing at job postings, it was the companies themselves rather than the particular positions offered that stoked my emotions. This would be a first you then me type scenario. Not the quickest way but still a way. Stories of heroes on long odysseys filled my heart as I trudged on. "I know I can't lose." The journey is what this is all about anyways right? We do these things because they are hard and all that.

Life is good. There are no worries, no challenges, nothing really for me to bother with. I cruise into work whenever I can drag myself in, amble around, say what's up to people I don't really care about and that don't really care about me but it's just what we do. Why not. Get to my desk and read some news. I like to be informed. Search for jobs a little. Do work as it comes and put on the cruise control until it is time to go home. Thank god! Cruise into my house, eat some dinner. Get to my desk and read some news. I like to be informed. Search for jobs a little. Stay awake for as long as I can because this is me-time. To sleep is to surrender to another day.